6 Years

A person asked me today: Clement, you will be going to there for 6 years, you don't want a farewell party?
That got me thinking.
No, not really, i don't want a farewell party.
What I want is,
I welcoming party when I get back.
I don't know how much people will be there to help me celebrate.
But, I daresay those people are the ones who truly care for me.
Rather then having a party before I go, I want one when I come back.
True Friends are eternal, though I don't think anyone will be waiting for my comeback except my family, so I don't expect much.
希望越大，失望越痛。
Having not much expectations, thought even no one celebrates for me, I will not feel sad.
Just used to it.
Clement, you have already gone through 5 years of this pain, there is no need to extend this.
Differentiate and Define whats your Fantasy world or true friends and the reality of 'friends'.
You have already been disappointed in every from, F1-Seniors, F2-Calvin,Choral Speaking F3-Class Monitor,F4-Daren,S2,Tan Kang Yao,F5-Prefect.
Everything you have experienced are major growth points towards maturity, teaching you how your 'friends' are truly are.
Your childish expectations, your manga preconceptions, your basic foundations in belief of friends are shaken and torn.
Grow up, give thanks to the pain, give thanks to the loneliness that you had experienced, those are things that made you this strong today.
I know it hurts when the ones you trusted the most was the one who started trash talking about you, I know it hurts when whom you believed to be your 'friends' said you bully them even though it was the only way you knew how to be friendly.
But, through the pain you've been through, you grown much.
Childhood dreams of having a best friend is now realistically abolished.
17 years living here, you don't have a friend who you can truly trust, who would stand up for you even if it means going against the masses, a person who knows how you feel. You had many people who know you and you know them, you had many 'friends', a bit of 'friends' who you truly trust but in the end hurts you the most, but none who you can depend on through thick and thin.
Grow Up.
Be independent from this kinds of relationships.
Family is all you would ever need.
Good Luck!!!